So I just finished reading Venus in Furs (which I was compelled to quote even before I finished reading it). It goes without saying that this book does a beautiful job of exploring the desire of a man to subjugate himself to a cruel and dominant female. However, being the wierdo that I am I also found some interesting quotes that resonated with me as a practitioner of the alternative relationship lifestyle (doesn’t that sound fancy, basically my partner and I are polyamorous). A puritanical society always seems to vilify a sexually voracious woman, we are witches, succubi, heartbreakers. I have always felt that a relationship is an opportunity for growth and enjoyment and yet we want to possess our partners and lovers. As Severin says in Venus in Furs:
We would rather have a pale, sorry Holbein Virgin who belongs entirely to us than a classical Venus, no matter how divinely beautiful, if she loves Anchises today, Paris tomorrow, and Adonis the day after. And when Nature does triumph in us, when we abandon ourselves in burning passion to such a woman, her cheerful joie de vivre strikes us as demonic, as cruel, and we see our bliss as a sin that we must atone for.
I have always rebelled against conventional relationships and the idealization of female virginity (unless of course we are talking about some good cherry popping erotica). And Wanda’s response to her society’s restraints:
But you mean to say that the individual who rebels against the institutions of society is ostracized, stigmatized, stoned. Fine, I dare to try. My principles are quite pagan, I want to make the most of my existence. I can do without your hypocritical respect, I prefer happiness.
Yes! Yes! Yes! And what sane passionate woman wouldn’t? Now the story takes a few interesting turns (some that I did not expect from what I heard about it) and you will have to read it yourself to really get to know these two characters. However, the last titbit I want to share with you is from the last page when the protagonist is trying to explain to his friend the moral of his story (remember this was written in the 1800s). He says that in their current society a woman can never be man’s companion, she is his “enemy” and can only be either his “slave or his despot”:
She will be able to become his companion only when she has the same rights as he, when she is his equal in education and work.”
Now maybe I am a complete nerd but I find that thought fascinating. That a cruelly dominant woman is a product of the patriarchal society. So in fact the very society that denies women equal rights is a breeding ground for the perfectly sadistic fem domme. Hmmm…
